The reason for blogging

29 June 2006, is the day I finally touched down on Singapore after an unwilling trip to Brunei. I bought nothing over there, as there is really nothing to buy. But I did brought back something that change my life... WORMS!!!

After I came back, I felt sick.. feeling nausea, bloated and diarrhea. Went to the GP 3 times and seen my MO 1 time... no cure. Went to Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH) A&E, took a course of antibiotic and I thought that I'll be well soon. I was wrong. Went back to TTSH A&E 1 week later, the doctor told me to wait about 3 weeks for a specialist appointment. I thought to myself "3 weeks!!! Will I be able to survive till then!" After 1 week, my mind could not endure the torture of going toilet at least 5 times a day, nausea and having no appetite any longer. I made my way to see my MO again to ask him to push forward my specialist appointment date..

To cut the story short, I end up back in TTSH A&E and for the first time in my life, I went into the observation ward. There I was, puking gastric juices ( no appetite) and having adominal pain that is unbearable. The doctor say its not serious enough to admit me in immediately. So they made me wait for 2 days to go CDC. ( Communicable Disease Centre ) *sounds like I have some scary disease* 3rd August 2006, my birthday. Still suffering.. the pain is more severe.. went to the toilet more often.. made Xueling cry, (she was so worried) I BEGAN TO PRAY. Asked Xueling to pray for me, I brought out my guitar and I START WORSHIPING GOD in the midst of my pain. TA DA!!! I was not healed. But I received a birthday present that day.

4th August 2006, warded into CDC, for the first time in my life I was warded into hospital. I suffered in pain for the first 2 and day 2 night. I prayed in the middle of the night to ask God to take away my pain.(I wish I could die) But He was silent. I lost 8kg and lots of sleep. I looked like a dead man walking. 6th August 2006, my girlfriend left me a book "Growing Deep In God" by Rev Edmund Chan to read. My life changed on that day. The next day, I was diagnosed with Hook Worm infection and I was discharge on National day.

The reason for blogging is for me to share with everyone my spiritual walk with God, to testify His great love to everyone and that He may be glorified in my testimonies. On my birthday, God heard my prayer. He knew what is the greatest gift for me. A "Burning Bush" An encounter with God that is life changing. The whole event of "Hook Worm Infection" is the "Burning Bush". I met God there and he touched me, therefore I'm changed. God taught me that suffering is a reminder for us to realise that we need to depend on God.

Physical suffering reminds me of the God that heal, the God who love us unconditionally. It make me want to depend on Him. I believe that most of us be it christian or non christian, when we are suffering, we pray. When we are suffering from heavy debt, we pray. When suffering from life failure, we pray. When all else in the physical realm fail us, we seek the spiritual realm. Interestingly this is how God made us. He wants us to seek Him and depend on Him through our cries, our prayer! Quoting from Rev Edmund Chan book "Growing Deep in God"
"Prayer is theologically significant - not for what it can do for us, but more for what it can bring back to us! Prayer bring us back to God. It answer the cry of our creation"
Yes! God want us to pray so that we can be brought back to God!

After I encountered God, He stir my heart to dedicate my life to be a life of prayer. So that I might build a close relationship with Him. In obedience, I now wake up before day break to pray (about 5am). This is very difficult for me as I'm a lazy and I love to sleep! But by God's grace, I've succeed for 4 morning and I have faith that I'll be able to do it till the end of my days. The experience I had for the past 4 morning is great! God gave me a renewed spirit that I do not have for the past 5 years!
In the last 5 years away from God, i withdrew myself away from God and from the community. I tried to relied on myself in everything i do. There were a few times where i try to return to God but i just could not. I just could not open my heart again to the community of God and God Himself. But through this encounter with God, my heart open almost immediately! I felt free in Jesus Christ again! A big thank you for those who have been faithfully praying for me and especially God who never let go of me!

Therefore my brothers and sisters in Christ,I encourage you to dedicate your life to be a life of prayer so that you may grow deep in God. Ask God for the Holy Spirit whom He willingly give (Luke 11:13)to teach us how to pray. For it is the Holy Spirit that guide and empower us in our prayers.

i praise God for all His good works in our life and i give thanks to God for every moment that He gave me!
*please pardon my poor command of english and made u read such a long story... i hate writing essay!! = P